5 Simple Rules to be Happy! (This Holiday Season)

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1. Free your heart from hatred

2. Free your mind from worries

3. Live Simply

4. Give More

5. Expect Less

&& Have a Merry Christmas!

Happy Hour Mixology: Candy Cane Cocktail

Enjoy this festive holiday cocktail with friends and loved ones:

Combine 2 ounces Strawberry vodka

4 dashes white creme de menthe

2 1/2 ounces of Cranberry juice 

& ice into a cocktail shaker.

Combine well & strain into glass. 

To garnish, simply crush candy canes and line the rim of martini glass. 

Enjoy!

Pinterest

What Have You Accomplished This Year?

 As the new year approaches, I decided to take a look at what I have accomplished this past year!

Here it is:

Moved 3 times!

Found Love

Moved into a house!

Danced in two shows (A Waltz Routine/Cha Cha Routine) (Christmas Show is on the 21st/Swing!)

Survived a tornado (a few) 

Saw my best-friends find love (& get engaged!) 

Started my side piece tattoo

Tried to get published (3 times) failed twice, eventually landed a spot in an underground zine

Started this blog and a few others

Adopted a kitty

Celebrated 9 months of being in a relationship.

Started a healthier lifestyle of diet and exercise

Dyed my hair red

Learned how to become a better cook

Spent Thanksgiving with new friends and family

Passed through the seven layers of the candy cane forest...

(Just messing with ya, seeing if your paying attention)

Took only ONE sick day

Got my first pair of ballroom dance shoes

Was kissed by the TN sun

Made new friends but never forgot the old

Started paying off those school loans

Planned a trip to Dallas, Texas 

Found myself within 3 states in a matter of moments

Went caving!

Swam past pool hours (yes, I know. I am a certified bad ass)

Experienced horses running freely in the wild...

Felt inspired and motivated to start a brand new year!

Happy Hour Readers: How about you?

Simply Seductive

LoVeLust?!

Ah, the day old question: What's the difference between love and lust?

The answer is simple: Lust is simply that burning desire and yearning to eagerly find LOVE. In layman's terms? It's a deceivingly wonderful mask that our object of affection wears to make us believe we are actually IN love.

But how do we decipher the two? Isn't there a manual for this kind of thing?

Now for those of you who know me, Carrie is my love slash relationship goddess. But can she provide the answers I need as I watch countless re-runs of Sex and the City?

Maybe...

But wasn't she IN LUST and IN LOVE with BIG!? Carrie, my dear, help a girl out!

Because I couldn't find the answer, I decided to define the two:
(In the same manor I used to write pro/con lists between two crushes in high school) And this is what I came up with:

Lust is: 
sexy,
passionate,
tempting,
crazy,
HOT!
that lovely feeling you get when the butterflies tingle throughout your entire body upon mere thought of him/her,
unexpected,
upon first sight,
upon first kiss,

WES WELKER?! (I kid, I kid)

In other words, lust is an overwhelming feeling that happens upon mere seconds of being within the vicinity of that person. It begs to question your sanity...

Love on the other hand, is a mutual understanding, a sense of security, a promise, an "I do", and an "I always will love you". (Please resist the urge to belt out Whitney right now, I had to.) Love is growing old together, a give and take, a reason to believe that everything IS possible. Love is what every living thing craves and NEEDS. More importantly, love is not only a combination of all these entities, but love IS that fun sexy side of lust.

Yes, it's true.

You can be MADLY IN LOVE and LUST after your partner. But you must be careful not to confuse the two...

Agh. I need another manual. 

Confusing the two, will not only lead you into believing you too, can be the character phenomenon Stephanie Myer seemingly created over night (Bella), but believing one's intentions are far less than what you expected. And thanks to Mr. Shakespeare himself, I do believe this to be true: "Expectation is the root of all heartache."

I was once in love/lust.

I say love/lust because I was totally head over heels "in love"? Or so I thought. It turns out I had spent a solid year of my life trying to convince my knight in shining tinfoil, that we were in fact going to have a solid future together. Maybe it was his perfect smile...or the way his ass looked in a pair of jeans...either way our relationship was entirely divulged in a sea of passion followed by arguments that would lead us no where.

How did I determine it was simply lust? From the moment I tried to have an honest conversation with him. I could not cry on his shoulder, reveal my deepest darkest secrets, or simply be myself in fear that he would not accept me...

That my friends is not love. Love is being able to completely lose it; go BAT-SHIT crazy. (You know those crazy conversations you have with him after too many glasses of wine that go a little something like this: YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYMORE! I'M NOT PRETTY ENOUGH! YOU CHECKED OUT THE GIRL AT THE DELI! WAH!) Don't act like you haven't done it... OR those lovely tantrums you throw when you are on your period. SHIT, he might as well just call a guy's night. The forecast is calling for unreasonable crying, The Notebook, and chocolate covered chips.)

Love, my friends, is being able to HANDLE and ACCEPT that MESS! :) But seriously, you know you are in love when your partner is able to accept you for you and you are able to accept him for him. Love is knowing that you have an actual future together...

HappyHour Readers: What are your thoughts on love and lust?

Stellar Sky

Start Each Day...

All photos were found on Tumblr!

Planning

jeanetteangel

"I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult."

EBWhite

Web of Deception

I found this photo on Pinterest: wish I knew the artist...

Although she tried, she could no longer comprehend the thoughts that cascaded dolefully throughout her uneasy mind. And as he kissed her, logic became that of the distance past. Unwillingly, as if her body was not her own, she found her limbs tangled around his warm body. The fear however, filled her heavy heart. It would only be a matter of time, she thought to herself, as she stared at the opulent ceiling above her. Like the familiar road one frequents, his lips traveled the contours of her womanly curves; memorizing every inch of her body.

Why, she wondered, did he have to break down the walls she had built to protect herself? Disaster bared a sense of beauty, but the allurement of love glistened helplessly before her hopeful eyes. When would it crumble before her? When would he realize the pattern of self destruction she had grown accustomed to? The thought alone was a splintering intrusion to her wounded heart.

Her gun laid before them on the nightstand. Once again she was reminded of the mistakes and decisions she had impulsively made. Did she really need the money? The off-shore account that threatened the life of the one she loved?

His mouth moved from her chest to her stomach where a scar presented itself. Although she longed to forget that particular evening, she could still see the knife entering her body and the warm blood that seeped from her blouse. They had threatened her, black-mailed her, and tortured her. She was their prisoner; a puppet within the hands of the vindictive. He would never know of her struggle; the inner turmoil that festered unbridled hatred.

 It had been their second date.

Although she had told herself, "Just a kiss", chemistry and two glasses of Merlot changed that simple promise. After dinner, they had found themselves on her unmade bed passionately intertwined. And as his masculine finger grazed the contour of her scar, she remembers him asking "What happened darling." She however avoided the question, and pulled him in for a kiss.

She later told him it was a simple surgery. Yet another lie to add to the web of deception.

 

I'm Getting Old...

26.

Ugh.

Sadly, I will be leaving that comfortable, self-assured state of being in my early twenties. Slowly but surely, I am beginning to graze the LATE twenties side of the spectrum. Sigh. 

And you want to know what's even more disappointing? Things like crock-pots and home decor gets me as excited as frat parties used to...

With that being said, I found a WONDERFUL blog about DIY Home Decor and I just had to share!

Header for DIY Design Fanatic

 Follow this link to her amazing blog and tips on how to decorate your home!

DIY Design Fanatic

Wardrobe Make-Over: Lace Tights!

http://tiredofbull.tumblr.com/

Have a pair of holey jeans that need a little style makeover?! 

Simply add a pair of lacy tights!

You can experiment with many different colors and styles as well!

Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil

Pinterest/beauty-ful

"Rule number one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know. 

John Berendt- Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

My Kinda Crazy

She says
"Look baby I'm a rock star"
Grabs my old guitar
Playin' it upside down
Dancin' around
In front of our tv

I can't see the ballgame
So I just wave my lighter and say
Yeah, rock on baby
I'd rather watch you anyway

But when you're done
Can I come backstage
And get you to sign your name
On that zeppelin shirt of mine you're wearin'
I'll never wash that thing again

Yeah and she's my kinda crazy
The little games she plays
Lord they'll never get old
She's too cute to get on my last nerve
The way she throws her little fits

Pokin' out her lip and bitin' mine when we kiss
There ain't a fight that she can't win
That's my baby
And she's my kinda crazy

You ought to see her in my pickup
She's gotta have that radio up
Bless her heart, she can't sit still
Head in my lap, bare feet on the windshield
Says, C'mon baby let me drive

Now honey it's a stick shift
Remember what you did last time
Oh...

She never let's me rest
She keeps me up all night
Known to roll me off the bed
And steal the covers off my side

But I hear, "Wake up sleepy head"
And I open up my eyes
And it's all worth the while

That's my baby
And she's my kinda crazy

-Brantley Gilbert

Warning: Images May Be Distorted Due to Socially Preconceived Ideals

Although I have always struggled with my weight and body image, I have never truly felt bad about my body...until last night. The reality of a sentence, not only induced tears, but a feeling of defeat. As I laid in bed the image of my body and the words "You can't suck that fat in" haunted me.  

You can't suck that fat in...

Probably the worst thing you can tell a girl. In fact I'd rather be called every name in the book than deal with that 3 lettered word. The word alone digs upon salted wounds...

With that being said how can women feel "good" about themselves, when they are continually ridiculed for who they are? What is ideal? What is perfect? And who the hell has the right to decide? And why should I have to change who I am to service this seemingly unattainable ideal? 

Why can't it be "OK" to carry a little around the middle? To have cellulite? God forbid...a stretch mark.

On any given day, the thoughts that precede:

Do I look fat in this?

Am I "sucking in" enough? 

Is 45 minutes enough exercise?

Am I freakin enough?

And you want to know the WORST part? The person who hurt me was a SHE. How can women support each other when we are our OWN worst enemies? How can we stand up to fight this cultural ideal when we are throwing verbal grenades at each other?

I hate to admit, but as I was browsing my "Thinspiration" websites, I came across a website that was very empowering and I encourage those who struggle with self esteem and body image to check it out.

It is called: My Body Gallery 

It is a website designed to allow women to see themselves more clearly. You simply put in your weight, height, pant size, and shirt size, and click search. Once you do this, you arrive at a gallery of "real" women who share your same sizes, height and weight.

Interested in checking it out: 

mybodygallery.com 

Lost in Translation

Pinterest

Poison

It was always the sweet reminder of how simple his life used to be, that drove him to mere insanity. And as he thought, once again, of the diamond on the nightstand, he unwillingly found himself parked in front of the local tavern. The bottle, was a means in which he could numb the feeling of failure; a means in which he could seemingly convince himself that he didn't need her. But as he pulled the key out of the ignition, he bowed his head in defeat.

As he walked into the bar, smoke formed around him like a thick, desolate fog encompassing the secrets of the broken hearted. Within moments, Jessica, his favorite bartender, presented the poison he so desperately craved; Johnny Walker on the rocks."How are you sweetheart?" she questioned as she crossed her arms over the bar directly in front of him. "You look like you have been through hell. Tough day on the job?"

Although he would rather be consumed in the allure of self-pity, he entertained her question. "I guess you could say that Jess. Crime scene was wiped cleaned. Impeccable, really. Bullet wound right through the chest." "I don't know how you do it Matson", she grimaced in disgust. "But, hell, I guess it pays the bills right?" she replied playfully, retrieving a bottle of vodka. "A whole lot more than what I make!" She smiled, as she walked over to a group of college girls and presented them the shots of vodka.

The bar on this particular evening was uncharacteristically slow, he thought to himself. And as he scanned the room, he saw the usual suspects; the unhappy husbands downing cheap lagers, the women with questionable morals, and of course the college girls who finally reached the legal drinking age. Sadly, he was one of them. "Jess, I need another one", he slurred as he lifted his glass up in the air. 

"Do I need to take your keys away from ya, Detective?" she winked as she poured him his drink. "No, I'll be fine. Either that or I can get one of the rookies from the station to pick me up." He joked. "As long as your safe, darling. Don't get me fired or anything."  She giggled, as he watched her full hips move around the bar. "What are your plans when you get out of here Jess?" he inquired, as he realized that the extent of his loneliness resulted in an offer to grab something to eat with the woman who fueled his addiction. "Me?" she replied somewhat surprised. "Yes, you. What are your plans when you get out of here?" 

"Well, I was just going to go home and go to bed." she whispered. "What did you have in mind? "Want to grab something to eat? he asked. "I have a couple things to ask you." "Such as..." she started. "Well, I'd prefer not to discuss it here. But, I do need to talk to you."

As a detective, he had become acutely aware of his surroundings and on this particular evening a piece of the puzzle, didn't seem to fit. "What time do you get off?" 

Pinterest/Whiskey

DIY: Acrylic Glass Ornaments

Oh Pinterest, you have inspired me to create yet again! 

Pinterest/Christmas

These BEAUTIFUL ornaments are not only easy to make but they can be used as gifts!

What you need:

A box of clear ornaments. Make sure they are clear!

An assortment of acrylic paints (the colors are up to you!)

Procedure:

1. Take the top of the ornament off, so you can put the paint inside.

2. To achieve effect: drip paint slowly into ornament. You can tap the sides and swirl the ornament to distribute the paint throughout. 

As you swirl the ornament, it creates a lovely marbling effect so much sure you use a variety of colors!

3. After you have created your little masterpiece, let them dry for about an hour, then hang them on your tree! 

To see step by step instructions visit: A Yellow Bicycle 

For The Love of Wine: Miranda Lambert's Wines

MirandaLambert.com

OH MY MOTHER F'N GOSH!

Miranda Lambert has a wine. 

That woman had me at; "I'm going home to load my shotgun"..

Made me fall in love with her when she sang that oh so bad ass line;

"His fist is big, but my gun's bigger; he'll find out when I pull the trigger."

Yes, Miranda Lambert is hell on heels,

A country girl who is not afraid to let you know you pissed her off.

And now she makes wines. I want all of them!!!

The best part?

They are $20 or less a bottle. 

Merry Christmas to Kristina? Any takers? Hint, Hint, Hint, Hint? 

Find them here: Miranda Lambert Wines

Allure

The manor in which her mouth formed those three simple words forced upon a whirlwind of nostalgia. She had been on stage, sitting upon a black bar stool, worn from repeated use; the original wood apparently visible. He had remembered her slight apprehension as she sat cross-legged adorned in a simple corset and stockings as she sang to the unhappily married men before her. At first it was her voice that seemingly induced a trance throughout the club as he watched men seize their conversations and laughter; their drinks no longer quenching their desire to become delightfully numb.
 
As she sang, her ice blue eyes sparkled, dancing to the tune of the unknown. What words pressed from her lips? He could not remember. All he could remember was the way her mouth moved; the tender passionate way they rolled off her tongue. Within moments, she had become an anomaly in an otherwise bland room.


"Come with me", she repeated, unknowingly destroying the images he had vividly replayed throughout his mind. "Damien?" she questioned, grabbing his muscular forearm."Damien, are you ok." As she awaited his response, he stood statuesque silently reminiscing the evening they had spent together upon her last song.


Although eager men had approached her in hopes to bed her, she had ignored their advances; smiling hypnotically with devilish intention. How he surpassed the barrier she seemingly presented to the world? He would never know, but he found himself engulfed in pure bliss as he ran his fingertips over her naked body. He had spent hours tangled within her sheets, memorizing every contour, every curve of her feminine body.


"Damien, are you ok?" She preceded once more. "Sorry", he murmured as he followed her back into the motel room. "I was just remembering." Curiously, she turned about, flipping her hair in a seductive wave. "Remembering what, Damien?" "Remembering this", he started as he pulled her neck close to his lips.


As his lips grazed her tender skin, she found herself surrendering to the burning desire that quickly engulfed her body. Slowly his hands explored her breasts; releasing a sweet moan from her lips. Her surroundings became hazy; a landscape of  pure unbridled passion. Within moments, she found her legs wrapped around his waist; their bodies pressed upon the motel wall. In one swift motion her bra fell upon his feet and she slowly unzipped her jeans welcoming his aggressive advances. A year had passed unwillingly, yet they found themselves where they had left off...within the allure of their tangled sheets.

pinterest

Serving Your Holiday Spirits

If you happen to find a few extra minutes during the holiday season and want to serve your favorite spirits  with a little touch of holiday flair, check out this simple idea I found on Pinterest:

Idea retrieved from Pinterest and azcentral.com

Freeze your vodka (or other favorite spirit) in a cranberry-laced block of ice. 

Takes just five minutes, plus freezing time (A couple of hours). 

 What you need to do:

Save and clean a square milk or orange-juice carton, and cut the top off. Put your favorite bottle of vodka inside. Add fresh cranberries and fill halfway with water. Freeze for at least four hours. When you're ready to serve, just peel off the milk carton and set your icy drink on a tray to catch the drips

Voila! 

Happy Holidays!

Holiday Gift Guide: For Your Besties

Stuck on what to get the girls this holiday season?  Maybe a little hard on cash? Look no further! A great gift can be theirs for as little as $5. 

A few months ago, I was introduced to a wonderful little make-up line at Target called E.L.F. (eyes, lips, face) Not only was it RIDICULOUSLY affordable, it was fun, chic, and yet another thing I could spend my check on. 

& Much of their line can be found online! 

*An added bonus for those who are secretly doing their Christmas shopping behind the work desk. 

(I won't tell).

Here are my top picks:

E.l.F 24k 32 Piece Eye-Shadow Palette

32 Beautifully pigmented shadows for only $14! 

According to the site:

"Our limited edition 24K 32-Piece Eyeshadow Palette is a luxurious addition to your makeup collection. The 24K signature gold palette features 32 pigmented hues to mix and match so you can create a custom blended look for any occasion. Each gorgeous shade has been hand selected to create countless stunning looks. Best of all, this sleek and portable palette is perfectly sized to take with you when you're on-the-go. The luxury design of the 24K 32-Piece Eyeshadow Palette makes this a keepsake so you'll always feel glamorous with each and every use!"

HappyHour Exclusive: SHOP RIGHT NOW, and you get this set for 50% off if you order BEFORE midnight. At check-out enter this code: GOLD50

Click here to check it out: 32 Piece Eye Shadow 

For the Friend who loves the Nail Salon:

5 Piece Nail Set

According to the site:

Our 5-piece limited edition Holiday Nail Polish Collection is a must-have for the perfect manicure this season. The bristle design glides color on flawlessly, and quick dry formula offers a flawless application every time. Infused with key nutrient Vitamin E for stronger, healthier nails. This collection comes packaged in a sparkling silver glitter box for instant holiday glam!

Our formula is FREE of: Toluene, Formaldehyde, and Dibutyl Phthalate (DBP).

Collection includes: 

 

Golden Goddess

Royal Purple

Blush

Cranberry

Metal Madness

 

AND GUESS WHAT IT'S ONLY $5!!

Click here to check it out: Essential Holiday Polish

 

&& of course check out even more gifts and makeup here:

EyesLipFace

Veteran's Day

Pinterest/Military

I wrote this a while back, but I want to re-post in honor of those who make sacrifices each and everyday to honor our freedom. 

At this moment, I don't know what you are thinking of. I don't know if you are scared, happy, sad, or angry. I don't know where you are. I don't know what your next mission entails. I don't know if you are awaiting a newborn, a beautiful wife, a loving family, or a beloved pet. I do, however, know this-that you are undeniably and deeply appreciated. I do know that you are a soldier, someone who fights for my freedom, a brave representation of what our country fights for each and every day. I am writing this letter to thank you for the struggles you may face each day; the yearning for a lover, a smile from your son or daughter. Your continual strength resides not only on the brink of battle but in the distance that separates you from the familiar and I want to thank you.

Fallen Tears

*I came across this story and it warmed my heart, please read and share as you wish.*

A little boy asked his mother, “Why are you crying?” “Because I’m a woman,” she told him. “I don’t understand,” he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, “And you never will.” Later the little boy asked his father, “Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?” “All women cry for no reason,” was all his dad could say. 

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry. Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked, “God, why do women cry so easily?” God said, “When I made the woman she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort. I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining. I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly. I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart. I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly. And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.”

“You see my son,” said God, “the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides.” 

Author: Unknown

Photo: elle.com

Happy Hour Mixology: Blowpop Martini

Do you have left-over Halloween candy? If so, try this fun recipe I found on Taste For Adventure!

And, please do not be skeptical of that bubblegum flavored vodka in the recipe...this little concoction is the perfect adult treat!

What you need:

2/3 cups of frozen lemonade concentrate, thawed

1 1/3 cups of water

1 1/2 cups of Bubblegum flavored vodka

4 tbsp. of sour apple OR watermelon flavored liquer

a handful of your favorite blowpops or dum-dums (as a garnish)

What you need to do: 

P.S it is SUPER simple

1. Combine ALL liquid ingredients in a large pitcher and stir  

(if you are already tipsy, don't worry it's nearly impossible to mess this up)

2. Refrigerate until serving

3. To serve just simply pour into Martini glass and garnish with a blow-pop!  

Perhaps too Early?

Pinterest/Christmas

I know. I am insanely early. 

But I couldn't help sharing these fun Christmas decoration ideas. They are so simple, fun, and will certainly brighten your home this Holiday Season.

Starting from the top:

To achieve the first look:

You may have to go out into the yard and gather some branches. You can choose whatever size you like but the larger the better since you will be hanging ornaments from the limbs.

Once you have gathered enough branches, it's time to spray paint! You can use either gold or silver spray paint depending on your taste. 

(Let the branches dry) 

Once dry, place branches in a large vase and hang a variety of ornaments from the limbs! 

How to make candle centerpiece:

Gather 6 red or maroon colored candles. 

(again you can experiment with the colors to achieve desired look)

Line 3 candles horizontally and 3 behind

Wrap ribbon around all of the candles and secure with a hot glue gun. 

You can also wrap cranberries and branches around the candles for a more festive look.  

To make wine bottles:

Have a glass of wine with a loved one! Once you have finished all of the bottle, save it! 

(Repeat 2 more times)

Clean out wine bottles.

Gather silver or gold spray paint and spray bottles (allow to dry)

Once dry, you can scribe "Peace", "Love", "Joy"  onto the bottles

HappyHour Tip: Don't have steady hands? Go to your local craft store and head for the scrap booking section. They have shelves upon shelves of lettering stickers that you can easily apply to the bottles. 

Happy decorating!

Beauty DIY: 4 Ways to use Epsom Salts

Next time you find yourself at your local drug store, pick up a $5 bag of Epsom salts! You can use the salts as a regular part of your beauty regimen whether its exfoliating in the shower or fading a nasty bruise!

As a body scrub: Add a spoonful of crushed up salts to your regular body wash, then lather up! 

To get beachy waves in the heart of winter: Mix a teaspoon of salts, a few drops of olive oil, and 1/4 cup of water in a spritzer bottle. Mist on damp hair.

As a hair clarifier: Combine 1 cup each of salt and lemon juice with a gallon of water. Let it sit overnight, then pour over hair before you shampoo.

To fade bruises: Toss two cups into the bath and soak. The salts' minerals fade bruises fast!

Source: Cosmopolitan (November Issue)

Pinterest/Beauty DIY

Beautiful

"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. 

These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. 

Beautiful people do not just happen."

-Elizabeth Kubler Ros

Pinterest/beauty-ful

Roses are Red...

I have a serious case of the Mondays.  

Although I am not really proud of this, I have to admit that I backed out of my driveway this morning into a ditch. At first I blamed it upon stupidity and the lack of depth perception I seemingly have when I simply do not give a flying "F". But, the more I thought about it, I came to the conclusion that this traffic mishap was a sign. And as I looked upon the garden of grass and weeds that hung lifelessly from my muffler, I thought to myself, today, is going to be the day where drinking before 5pm may be necessary.

This plan, however, was quickly eradicated due to the fact that I have to be a responsible adult.  And to be completely honest, as I reflect upon responsibility lately, I look admiringly back to my college days where I could sleep in, eat chicken patties, and drink cheap $1 well drinks.

Ah, to be completely free again. 

  

Anyways, back to my case of the Monday's.

Doesn't Monday know that I spent the better half of my weekend with a glass of wine in hand? That my brain functioning is that of none? That I may or may not have knocked a few brain cells out as I fell upon my ass obtaining firewood on our camping trip? Come on Monday, get a clue! I need a day off from society; a day to proudly proclaim my exhaustion free of judgment. 

And because I am feeling rather sarcastic and sassy today, I have a few things to share with you that may help you smile on your case of the Monday's:

hehe

 Today, I am also feeling delightfully immature and this poem makes me giggle uncontrollably. Of course this poem can be re-mixed in a variety of ways. Simply insert inappropriate words. Voila.

PS. Vagina. 

Again, on days like today, when I need to rant, I do not need my smart phone "correcting" my swear words. When I want to say "Shit" please do not change it to "Shut". "Shut" simply does not pack the punch that SHIT does. Nor does "he"ll" when I want to state "What the hell."

Agh, I am already feeling better. :)

HappyHour readers: How do you deal with the case of the "Monday's"?

Derail

The difference between sanity and insanity were slim, he silently thought to himself. Moments before, he was content, well rested; eager to continue the journey before him. But as he lit his final Marlboro, he felt unbridled rage boil beneath his skin. She was an explosive ball of energy and fury that made his skin crawl yet he continually found himself surrendering to her breathtaking beauty. What was it about her? What was it about her that made him want to follow her? Clearly, she didn't need him. "Fucking women", he muttered as he put out the last of his cigarette.

"Hey man, I hate to bother you, but is everything ok?" a voice echoed apologetically. Before him, Damien saw a man in his late twenties; clean cut, shaven. "What's it to you?" Damien huffed sarcastically. Curiosity, Damien concluded, was a rather insatiable human trait. "Just heard some yelling, wanted to make sure everything is ok", he replied. "But, I will be on my way. If you need anything I will be at the front desk right around the corner." 

Damien watched as he slowly walked away. For a moment he contemplated asking the man for the bus schedule. But, the mere thought of leaving her yet again, left him nauseous. She has, and always will be his destiny; the path in which his heart will seize to derail. 

An hour had passed before she came out the motel room. He had glanced incessantly upon his watch waiting for her. "Are you going to talk to me now Damien?" "Depends," he started, "Are we going to have a conversation like two adults?" 

"Want to know everything Damien?" she whispered. "Come with me."  

Pinterest/Walk Away

This Holiday Season

Although his flight is delayed, he remains calm. It has been nearly two years since he has been home. He stands proud in his uniform; an ever pressing reminder of the services he provides for his country. His sacrifice; intangible, for the freedom he grants his loving wife and newborn, keep him strong. Nervously, he flips through a magazine gazing incessantly at his watch. Outside, the clouds reveal the whisper of the first snowfall. December 23rd.

She too, watches the snow fall as she warms her tired feet by the fire. In her hand, she holds a letter from her high school sweetheart. His kind words brings a smile to her face but she knows he would not be home for Christmas this year. Although loneliness has set in, she remains hopeful as she places tender kisses on their new born son.

Alas, he hears the echo of his zone number being called through the static of the intercom. Busy strangers rush to the flight deck ticket in hand. A surge of excitement escapes him as he smiles to the flight attendant. "Happy Holidays Soldier", she gushes with a wink of an eye. 

At the stroke of midnight, she is suddenly awoken by a knock on the door. Startled, she wraps her flannel robe around her body and stumbles down the dark hallway. Through the glass, she makes out the slender shadow of her husband. Her somber walk becomes a sprint as she unlocks the dead bolts throwing herself into his arms. "Merry Christmas Baby", he whispers as he kisses her for the first time in two years.

I once read that:

"The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree:
The presence of a happy family all wrapped in each other."
Burton Hills

By nature, we long for the newest technology, the designer handbags in the window, or even the expensive vacation we have been dreaming about, for the holidays. Yes, we are all guilty of becoming engulfed within our extensive wish lists from time to time. But what about the intangible gifts we present to each other throughout the holiday season? What about the thoughtful gestures such as the soldier surprising his wife by coming home for the holidays? Presence alone, can be the greatest gift of all.

As we count down the days until Christmas, I encourage you present a gift you can give a loved one that they will not only cherish, but remember for the rest of their lives. 

Pic: Pinterest/Snow